S E A S O N S !

     Spring sprang and fall is already almost at an end... Where did this time go? I feel like these past nine months with Brielle have been the shortest nine months of my life. There have been so many different changes in this past year and they all just flew by. I am so thankful for my wonderful husband who is trying to be the best he can be and for always trying to make me happy. We celebrated Thanksgiving early with my Grandparents and with our whole extended family, before we sat down for dinner my Grandpa wanted to hear from all of us what the best thing of this year was. I thought it through and Brielle is the best thing of this entire year. She has changed everything. She's brought people together, she's healed broken relationships, she's brought love, she's brought a gentleness from Spencer and she's made me something else. She's turned me into a mom and she's shown me how to be truly selfless.  
     Before I had Brielle I didn't know how hard things can be. I never knew what being tired was until her. I've learned to give certain things up so I can be there for her and care for her and it's made me a better person. It really changes you to know that someone so little and helpless depends solely on you to keep her safe and healthy. But I can't protect her from everything. I can't promise her she'll never be hurt. I can't promise her her heart won't break. I've learned to rely on the one I depend on. I know that no matter what tries to bring her down throughout her life won't be fought alone. She will have God right there by her side. Sharing in her joy and wiping her tears in every season of her life. He'll hold her close. Even if she pushes him away he'll be there waiting, never leaving.
     There have been times when I've ignored God and chosen my own path to "happiness". But every time I have he's brought me back. No matter what pain, no matter what he wanted me and wouldn't let me go. He's been my first true love and would not let me hurt myself anymore. In the end, despite my sin and mistakes. He gave me Brielle. A perfect angel. She will one day break my heart but I will never let go. Never. I can't wait to see how she grows and to spend every season with her from here on out. He gave me Spencer, despite everything he's been true and loyal. How could I not be happy? 
     "For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11
    

As we enter new seasons in our life I am so excited. It's our first time as a family of three to celebrate the holidays and make new traditions and reminisce some of the old. I can't wait to see all that comes every new year and I can't wait to spend it with my new family. This is a time for joy and laughter. :) 

Contentment

     Lately life's just been going past me too fast. Brielle's four months old and I'm moving this summer or fall... I feel so nostalgic. I miss when I lived out in the country and I would ride past the kitchen window on my old horse streaker and I'd reach in and my mom would pass me lunch out the window. I'd lay back in the grass reading stories about adventure and daydreaming about what my life might be. Growing up is so hard. I know it's best for Spencer if we move out so I'm doing it for him but it's just another huge change in my crazy life. I miss the simple things. I miss eating stacks of otterpops while watching my mom fiddle with her flowers. I miss swimming all day with my very best friend and her silly dad's pool. I miss the excitement of that curly haired, blue eyed boy staring at me across the room. I miss spending every second of summer laying in the grass and jet skiing  on a sparkling lake. But I trust God. I know that his plan is so much bigger than anything I could ever imagine. I also know that change is so good for me. 
     I feel so thankful for the parents I've been given and how willing they are to help me make rent. I just wish I didn't have to ask them for that. It would've been nice if I were older and financially capable. But wishing things were different is the way to build a bitter and empty heart. I am determined not to wish my life away and focus on all the blessings I have TODAY. I have a beautiful daughter, sunshine on my face, the best parents, a best friend for a brother, giving in-laws and a husband who loves me. What else could I want? Even though this summer is different it's going to be great. I was disappointed because I love helping with VBS and teaching little hearts about Jesus. This year I wasn't going to be able to help because I didn't want to leave Brielle for that long. But I'm able to lead games. It will be so fun to help in some way. I'm really excited. Little blessings are all I need.
     I'm excited to see what this year holds and even though I had to grow up fast you'll never catch me complaining. I have so much good around me there's no reason to be sad. 3rd song on my playlist is my encouragement today. I have a divine romance with a God who is indescribable. What more could a girl want?
    
"Along with her husband and children, Ella worked as a missionary with the pygmies in Africa for 52 years. She had left her family, her country, and all that was familiar.  Primitive doesn’t begin to describe her living conditions in the scorching heat and humidity of the African bush. But Ella found no relief because electricity, air-conditioning, and other modern conveniences were only a dream. Some days it was so unbearably hot that she had to bring the thermometer inside because it couldn’t register past 120 degrees without breaking.
Ella’s daughter, Mimi, is my friend. Mimi wondered how her mother had done it – how she had lived a life of contentment when her circumstances would have caused the hardiest to complain. Recently Mimi unearthed a treasure, a much more significant find than gold or silver. In an old diary of her mother’s she, discovered Ella’s prescription for contentment:
*Never allow yourself to complain about anything – not even the weather
*Never picture yourself in any other circumstances or someplace else
*Never compare your lot with another’s
*Never allow yourself to wish this or that had been otherwise
*Never dwell on tomorrow –remember that tomorrow is God’s, not ours"

 

Being Mom

      
     This week my mom and dad left to volunteer at a Christian camp, my mom will be the nurse and dad will be her... sidekick? So it's made me think a lot about motherhood and the kind of mom I want to be. I'm sure they're having an amazing time and who wouldn't love having a nurse like mine giving you candy while fixing booboos???? I've never met a child who doesn't adore my mom. She has a lot of patience and gets even the nastiest kids to turn around. I think the reason I'm good with kids is because she is the queen of fun. So while they're gone Spencer and I have the place to ourselves! I was really worried about it because I always go to her for questions about Brielle and she's out of cell phone reach so I have to wait for emails. I'm actually doing great. It makes me feel really good because now I know for sure that Spencer and I are ready to move out and do it on our own. Even without the extra hands I'm getting everything done, the house is spotless and I haven't killed any birds yet! The one thing that's hard about being alone is, I MISS THEM.

     My mom is one of my best friends and my dad is the greatest. Yes, I know if my mom were hear she'd be pulling the "I'm your mom not your friend." card but... She's my friend and mom. I hope that I can be the kind of mom mine has been. She's been an encourager, leader, nurturer, teacher, disciplinary and guidance all my life. The best thing about her is she never does anything for herself. It seems like everything she does is for others. Sometimes she's hard to understand. Most people have some sort of motive and reason for the things they do. But she does everything to be Christ-like which means, serving others. But at the same time she has boundaries and protects herself. She's always told me that nobody can use you as a doormat unless you let them. I know that a lot of the time she gets misunderstood because of how she lives but I still want to be just like that.  Even if nobody ever says "thank you" or understands.

     Jesus didn't call us here to have a good time and make ourselves happy. He asked to be bigger than that. He wanted us to take a step out in faith and do what doesn't come naturally, to love the unlovable. Jesus didn't turn away from anybody. He welcomes the young, old and sinners to be part of his family. Even when others mocked him and told him it's wrong to help prostitutes and the lowest of the low he continued. Instead of telling them "You're right. Why help those who do nothing for you!" He said "It's not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick." [Matthew 9:12] 
     So as I'm thinking about the person I want to be. I want to be a wife of noble character who's gentle and encouraging. I want to be a mom who you can always count on and at the same time be steady and strong. Something my mom did really well was she always tells it how it is. She's not going to pretend she agrees with you or let you get away with being stupid. It's so funny because some of Jordan and my friends come over to talk and hang out with HER. Because they know she'll love them no matter what but at the same time will be honest and say what needs to be said. I want to be honest and be filled with wisdom. It's so important that I, as a mother, know my bible so I can always bring my children back to what God has said. My mom admits when she's wrong and if she said something she shouldn't have. I want to be like that too. I think it's good to tell your kids you're sorry if you messed up because it shows them, nobody's perfect but keep trying. I love my baby girl so much and I can't wait to see how she grows up and what she wants to be. I'm sure there will be hard times and she'll let me down but I'll never give up and I'll always forgive. I can't wait to see what the future holds for my family!! ♥

¹⁰ A wife of noble character who can find?
    She is worth far more than rubies.
¹¹ Her husband has full confidence in her
    and lacks nothing of value.
¹² She brings him good, not harm,
    all the days of her life.
¹³ She selects wool and flax
    and works with eager hands.
¹⁴ She is like the merchant ships,
    bringing her food from afar.
¹⁵ She gets up while it is still night;
    she provides food for her family
    and portions for her female servants.
¹⁶ She considers a field and buys it;
    out of her earnings she plants a vineyard.
¹⁷ She sets about her work vigorously;
    her arms are strong for her tasks.
¹⁸ She sees that her trading is profitable,
    and her lamp does not go out at night.
¹⁹ In her hand she holds the distaff
    and grasps the spindle with her fingers.
²⁰ She opens her arms to the poor
    and extends her hands to the needy.
²¹ When it snows, she has no fear for her household;
    for all of them are clothed in scarlet.
²² She makes coverings for her bed;
    she is clothed in fine linen and purple.
²³ Her husband is respected at the city gate,
    where he takes his seat among the elders of the land.
²⁴ She makes linen garments and sells them,
    and supplies the merchants with sashes.
²⁵ She is clothed with strength and dignity;
    she can laugh at the days to come.
²⁶ She speaks with wisdom,
    and faithful instruction is on her tongue.
²⁷ She watches over the affairs of her household
    and does not eat the bread of idleness.
²⁸ Her children arise and call her blessed;
    her husband also, and he praises her:
²⁹ “Many women do noble things,
    but you surpass them all.”
³⁰ Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
    but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
³¹ Honor her for all that her hands have done,
    and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.

 Proverbs 31:10-31

BRIELLE UPDATE ~ She's rolling over! I can hardly get her to stay on her back anymore she's so funny. The 23rd she did it and ever since then she won't stay still. It's funny because she's never liked tummy time but now she's doing it all the time because she can't roll on her back. Hahaha she's too cute.

Time

     
     Sometimes I get SO exhausted. At the end of the day all I want to do is sit on the couch and clear my head and relax. I know I have it easy, my mom is very helpful and Brielle is a wonderful baby; I'm just tired. During the day I play with Brielle and clean but in the evening I have NO motivation. Right when I sit down baby wants to walk. She wants to look around and be close to Mama. I find myself becoming frustrated with Spencer for not "helping" enough. But he does try to help! He always offers to take her and walk but I want it done a certain way. Deep down I know it should be me holding baby girl and deep down I WANT to. I realized something the other day. This is the only chance I get with her. Pretty soon she won't want me to hold her and walk her. Pretty soon she's not going to want to bounce on my lap and pull my hair. This is my one chance I have with my daughter as a baby. Before I know it she'll be gone.
      
     So when she is fussing I'm going to happily lay down with her even if it means I miss T.V. time. WHO CARES??? There will always be a new show, there will always be a new "cliffhanger" but Brielle will not always be here needing and wanting me. The other night Brielle kept fussing so I went and let her lay in bed with me and she stopped and just looked at me. I touched her soft, fuzzy hair and rubbed her back until she fell asleep. That was a moment I can't replace and if I hadn't taken the time to just lay with her I would have missed it. 
     
     I love being a mom. Some days yes, I want to just hide and be alone but everyday I love being a wife to Spencer and a mother to Brielle. I will never pass up a moment with my husband or with Brielle. 

Motivated

     Brielle is the most wonderful girl in the world. She's a princess and I hope she always knows it. Today we had an early birthday party for my brother (his birthday is tomorrow yeeee!!!) and she was so good with her great-grands. She lets anybody hold her and she gave out lots of smiles. I can already tell she is going to be so kind and loving. My grandpa and I were standing in the kitchen and he was talking to her for at least 5-10 minutes and she just sat there smiling and  gently cooing. What a lovebug!!!
     I'm officially motivated again to run! I got out of my groove for awhile but today I ran 4.92 miles in 27 minutes! WAHOO! Color Me Rad here I come! I want to eat healthy and be in shape, it's not because I want to look good or be competitive but I want to be able to run and play with my children. I want to be able to coach their soccer team and raise them to be healthy and live a long full life. Especially since I'm going to home school Brielle and her future siblings I want to be able to do PE class with them and make it fun. I don't want to be to tired and too weak to play. I want to eat healthy and be fit for my husband. Health is really important to him and I want to start living the same way he does so our kids won't have to deal with me and my big mac while Spencer eats his celery. I believe that the husband should be the leader in the house so I intend to follow him in every way I can.
     In the bible study I attend we are doing a Beth Moore study on Esther, "it's tough being a woman". Something I learned this week that really just hit my heart was this, am I willing to do the work to see the wonder? It seems like we just expect life to be perfect because we "deserve" to be happy right? Well honestly we don't deserve much really. Jesus did it all. Every good thing we do comes from him. I realized that in my life I expect to see all the wonder and joy in the world, but a lot of the time I'm not willing to do the work.
     If I want to see how wonderful my marriage can be, I HAVE to put the work in. I have to fight as hard as I can to be the woman God made me to be and pray everyday that he'll help me with that. If I want the joy of motherhood, I have to work my hardest to love my daughter and raise her the way Jesus told me I should. So I am motivated to love my Savior with all my heart, try to be the woman I'm meant to be and live a healthy lifestyle. Well, that's it for today! 





     Yours truely, XOXOXOXO!
    

Life & Love...

      One thing about Spencer is, we are OPPOSITES.  He sees blue, I see pink. I'm an extrovert, he's an introvert. He's a "realist" which every pessimist says about themselves, I'm an optimist. I guess that's why they say opposites attract. Spencer and I can always find something to argue about. Lately we've been arguing a lot about the little things. 
     Normally one or the other will just drop it and we rarely fight, but lately we both are embracing our stubbornness. So I'm going to try harder to be the woman he needs and the wife I'm supposed to be. He's an amazing man and I need to respect him the way I had June 11th, 2011. The thing I've found about marriage is we need to respect our men not because the DESERVE it, but because they are our husbands. Spencer is an amazing man, but there are times were he definitely doesn't act like and I know I'm not always a great wife. But the thing that's kept us together all this time is that we won't give up. I will spend my entire life trying to show him respect, and he will spend his life trying to love me.
     I'm so happy, despite fights and hard times, I'm happy. I'll always try as hard as a I can to love him.  We both will. 
     I've been thinking a lot about how we never had a big, fancy wedding. We never had our first dance, we never kissed at the alter. This summer we're planning to do something for our anniversary so it brings up a lot of thoughts. Despite the fact that we never got a big celebration of love, I feel like we love bigger than we thought we could.
     We've been through so much together and he's stuck with me through it all. I think that the most important thing we can do for each other is vow to never give up.  I'm a happy little mama with a wonderful husband. I am committed to trying my hardest in this major. Tonight when he get's off work we'll get some virgin pina coladas and laugh. 


     One thing about Spencer is, he's my very best friend.

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J2oEmPP5dTM

Film Photography

I developed my first three rolls of film! I'm not going to lie, a lot of them did NOT turn out well. But the ones I did right look awesome and I love them. I love the camera my hubby got me! All photos were taken by Canon AE-1 Program 35mm film SLR, enjoy. 

Haven't posted in awhile...

     I haven't posted anything in a really long time, so I guess I should probably get back on it! With baby Brielle & nice weather - life get's crazy! Spencer's schedule is full almost everyday. He gets up early goes to school until 11 and leaves for work at 11:30 and works doubles until 7 or 8pm. I miss him a lot of the time but when he does get a day off it's great! We recently went on a mini road trip with Brielle, we got big burgers and looked over the gorgeous water. We are completely adjusted to our new life and though it's tiring and difficult all three of us are really happy. I love my little family and am glad I get to be apart of it. ♥

     Brielle has reached so many of her milestones at such an early age! She is an amazing little girl and we love her to death!

                *Smile/Laughter
                *Roll Over
                *Holds head steady
                *Stands for 30-45 seconds when held
                *Coos/"Talks"

     She is so happy and smiles all the time. She recognizes Spencer and I really well and if she hears our voices she looks around trying to find us, it's too cute! She's not as smiley with people she doesn't know yet but if they are goofy enough she'll laugh!

   
     Spencer surprised me with an early Mother's Day gift!!! I've been wanting to get into film photography for a long time so he got me an slr ae-1 program canon 35mm film camera!! I was so happy and surprised. I'm also really excited for this Sunday because their doing child dedications at church and Brielle's in it! Basically what it is is announcing Brielle to the church and expressing that we as parents want to be held accountable in the way we raise Brielle and everyone will pray for us and Brielle. I'm really excited especially because it's my first mother's day.

     Well that's all I have today. Hopefully post more news soon!!!

S U R P R I S E !

     This morning I woke with a call from my boss who is also a great friend. I had missed it so once Brielle woke up I called her back, she told me that her neighbour was giving me one of her cars, I was just like oh good blah blah blah.  I assumed she meant she was letting me use the car to drive my  boss' kids around. (That's the arrangement we'd talked about earlier in the week) Then she starts saying "Yeah so all you have to do is get the papers and put it under your name..." I flipped out!!! I was so excited!! I couldn't comprehend what she was saying, but then she came and picked me up and I went to see it and it's real!! I can't believe how blessed am. A complete stranger gave me and my new family a car... Wow. Everyday God just shows me more that he's on my side and loves me. So here it is, our 1991 Buick baby!!! 

 

Training Day 2 & 3

    The day after my mom, Abby and I went on our first run(19th) we went to bodyworks at La Fitness. It was really hard but REALLY good. We kicked but and got a great workout, of course I was so sore the day after but I still loved doing it. I want to keep going as much as I can. 

     On Wednesday Abby and I were planning on going on a morning run. It was POURING when I woke up! But we are committed to going every 3 days no matter what. So I drug myself out of the warm, cozy bed next to my sweet sleeping Baby Bee. Since it was so rainy and dreary we thought it wouldn't be smart to bring Brielle in the rain because if she were to cry we'd have to take her out of her stroller and I didn't want her out in the cold. So my mom offered to stay home and watch Brielle which I so, so, so appreciated. Even though it was hard to leave my precious daughter I knew she was in safe hands. So Abby came and picked me up and we headed to the trail. Once we got there after about 5 minutes of being there the sun came out and the sky turned blue. It was so beautiful! We just kept saying how God cleared the skies just so his two girls could have a run and enjoy his beautiful creation.  We had so much fun running in the sun and just talking. It was a GREAT run. 

     March 20th 2013: 5 minute walk, 1 minute run - 1 minute walk (8 times), 5 minute cool down. We did the whole trail and were so sore afterwards but so proud of ourselves! 

     Today I went on a run by myself, I was planning to go just 3 days a week but I was dying to get out in the sun and I'm really starting to love exercising since I don't get to ride horses anymore. Before when I rode I got out everyday but every since I had to stop I've been way too much of an indoor girl. Anyways today I just ran around our neighbourhood, I only went for a little over a half an hour. It's just getting easier and easier! I'm so happy! Today I didn't even need all the breaks which is so great, because the first run I was DYING for that breather. Haha! 
     March 21st, 2013: 5 minute walk, 1 min run - 1 min walk (8 times), 5 minute cool down 

I Love My Baby Bee

     Brielle is incredible, I love her so much I can barely stand it. It's amazing to me how much  one so tiny and new could already mean to all of us. I pray for her everyday that she'll come to know Jesus and love him more than I ever could. I can't believe how much she's already changed lives and how she'll continue to do that all her life. Spencer and I wonder together all the time how she'll be and what she'll do. We know we will love her no matter who she becomes with all our hearts, but it's so fun to think about. I imagine our summers when she's a little toddler running through the garden with my mom and I. Hand and hand with her Daddy at the farmer's market. Then one day running with me through the woods on horseback. Ah I can't wait! At the same time it's already going too fast.
     I just adore her and her Daddy. Our new family is everything I've ever wanted. Yes, it's extremely difficult but I trust that God will take care of us all the days of our lives. This spring break Spencer and I are taking Brielle with us to the beach for the first time and I can't wait. It's our first vacation together as our own family in our own hotel and everything. We've had so many new adventures and there are so many more to look forward to...

Training Day 1

     Today my mom, Abby, Brielle and I went for a run to train for the Color Me Rad 5k in June. (colormerad.com) I'm so excited! It's going to be a blast and great motivation to get back in shape and get outside. We're doing a workout were we run for one minute then walk for one minute. It's really doable and still makes my heart pound and makes me work hard, especially after a ninth month break! I stayed fit during my pregnancy but of course my cardio is nonexistent right now. Haha!
     We are going to be running three times a week and in between those days we're going to La Fitness and doing a "Body Works" class. It's basically weight lifting, squats, lunges, ab workouts etc. I love it! My mom and I also go to Zumba sometimes which is really fun. Of course not being able to bring Brielle with me is painful, but I know it's good for me to go. 
     March 18th, 2013: 5 minute walk, 1 minute run - 1 minute walk (6 times), 5 minute cool down. We went a total of 6 miles today, obviously we only ran for 20 minutes, but it felt so good to actually get out there and meet our goal!!

     Today Brielle is one month old! It's so crazy how the time flies. She's already looking me in the eye and whenever she hears Spencer's voice she becomes super alert and looks for him. Even in her sleep she'll start wiggling in her dreams if she hears her daddy. She is so much fun to watch and play with. I don't want to miss a moment she's already grown so fast. I can't believe how big she's gotten. She's already in her 3 month clothes.  WOW. Were did the tiny little 7lb baby go? She's stolen all our hearts and we are all so blessed to have her in our lives. I'm praying everyday that I'll raise her right and that she will fall in love with Jesus Christ. I'm so very excited to see what she'll become some day. 
      Well that's all for today. I'll try to post more consistently about Brielle and how training is going. :)

Brielle Jordan Baker's Story ♥

     Wow, I haven't posted in a long time!  Brielle is now 3 weeks and 5 days old , CRAZY! She is absolutely everything we dreamed of and so much more. The 13th she smiled at me for the first time. I can't believe how fast she's growing and what a blessing she is in my life. So I decided that since I missed posting about my last week of pregnancy, I'll post Brielle's birth story. So I'll get to it!

 

     I took this on Valentine's day (2/14/13) it's the last picture I have from when I was pregnant and as you can tell, I was HUGE! Ready to pop is definitely more than just a cute phrase when you're THAT pregnant. On February 18th, two days after I took this picture, I was 39 weeks 3 days pregnant. My water broke that morning at 5 am, I tried to wake up Spencer, keyword TRIED. Haha! I whispered his name several times then finally I just said loudly, "My water broke!".  He jolted up and his eyes were wide. Then we both looked at each and smiled and he said, "This is it!". 

     At 5:30 am contractions started and were uncomfortable but no pain at all. Spencer had went back to sleep and I knew I should rest too but I was way too excited. So I came out and  my Mom was up getting heat pads ready, ice cubes made etc. I hopped in the shower to clean up and try to relax and soothe the aches. Around 6 am my mom and I started watching a movie we had just bought, "Fried Green Tomatoes" which is now one of my favourites. My contractions started to get painful around 7/7:30 am and I started to pause and try to relax and stop talking when they came. At 9 am Spencer was awake and out to help me. I really wasn't feeling good but I still felt like I could keep going, it wasn't too intense or anything.

     Then my whole family came out around 11 am and they started to watch "Moonrise Kingdom" at this point I watched in between contractions but during them I was really focused and just concentrated on being calm and dealing with the pain. If somebody talked to me during a contraction I couldn't respond and was far to involved in what was going on inside me to pay attention to anybody else.

     After the movie my mom left to go to a patient and my dad and brother went in the family room to play video games. Spencer and I walked around the house over and over to keep the contractions coming strong and quickly. We paused during the contractions because I couldn't walk through them at this point and Spencer held me and I just took long deep breaths. Spencer was timing contractions and at this point they were 5 minutes apart lasting 45 seconds. We kept walking for about 45 minutes. Once my mom came back home we stopped and I sat on an exercise ball rocking while Spencer rubbed my back. 

     Spencer needed to get his homework done so he worked on that and I laid down trying to sleep in between the pain. That was a big mistake. I did dose off but suddenly I woke up and was in EXTREME pain. There was no way to relax with it coming that quickly and not being able to prepare for it. After that happened I started to get really discouraged and started to cry. Spencer came over just as the sun was coming through the window and told me I'd be okay and the sun had come out just for me. I felt so much better and knew I could do it. 

     I lost track of time so I don't know what time it was when we went back to the living room and watched "How to Lose a Guy in Ten Days". Well we had it running in the background. Haha! The contractions were unbearable. I kept waiting though because I didn't want to go the hospital too early because I knew there was no way I could resist pain medications.  Eventually I knew I had to go, I was in so much pain I could barely take deep breaths anymore without wanting to scream. I was shaking and quivering and felt extremely nauseous. Spencer and my Mom ran and got everything in the car and we headed out. 

    By the time we got to the hospital I was crying and shaking. They got me into the exam room and told me I was 5 to 6 centimetres dilated. It was so discouraging because I thought I was at least an 8. The nurses asked if I wanted an epidural and I told them my plan and they said they'd get the tub running for me. They kept asking me questions and I was at the point were I couldn't talk to anybody. They left me waiting in the exam room and I was in so much pain I screamed during the next coming contractions. Once they realized this was real they rushed me to a room in bed because I couldn't walk. I wanted to push and needed to but when they checked me again in the room I was only an 8 so I had to wait. 

     That was the worst part, I was trying so hard not to push but I NEEDED to. My body was fighting me in everyway. The rest of this flew by and I can't remember much, it's all jumbled. I remember the nurse told me I was a 10 so I could push, but then when the doctor came she told me I was only an 8 so I had to wait longer. I remember Spencer giving me an oxygen mask in between contractions. I remember when I could push having extruciating pain, then I remember holding Brielle and Spencer crying. It was wonderful! I think we both agree it was the best moment of our lives. Finally having Brielle here in that moment we were on top of the world. Brielle was born 7.9lbs and 20 and 3/4 of an inch long. Just perfection.

     So that was Brielle's story. Spencer was amazing, my Mom was the best and Brielle was perfect. I couldn't imagine being more happy than I was in that moment. 

     That day was the best day of my life and I will never forget those first moments Spencer and I had with Brielle. It was incredible.